You know how there are questions asked that are just plain stupid? Well, the question “don’t you wish you had a boy?” qualifies as stupid. Or better yet, that ultra dumb comment “you need to have a boy.” Ummm… no. I don’t. I don’t need to have a boy. I do though need to have children that are healthy. This is why I am writing this post: how I feel about having all girls.
Sadly, nowadays it has become a fad to have both genders when having kids. While yes, it is nice to have both genders, that’s not the general rule. There are those who have all boys or those who have just girls (like me). And that’s where another stupid comment comes in. “Awe, poor you! You need to have the other gender next!” No! Not poor me. Poor you for even saying such a dumb statement.
Listen to me and listen to me good: YOU DO NOT NEED TO HAVE BOTH GENDERS. Anyone having children is blessed they can have children, regardless of the gender. And even better, having a healthy baby. There are many out there wishing they could get pregnant and have a baby. And trust me, they could care less the gender, if only they get pregnant (praying for all those who wish to have a baby to have one soon!). So for one to think “poor you” to someone for having all one gender is just a low thought in my honest opinion.
Now, don’t get me wrong. Having both genders is nice. But so is having children who are the same gender. When I was 20 and pregnant, I wanted a boy. But I think I wanted a boy because my husband did. But I had a girl and wow was I over the moon! Then at the age of 23 I was pregnant again and could’ve sworn this time a boy! And yes, I wanted a boy. Was it because my husband did? Maybe, maybe not.
When I found out my second was also a girl, I was excited. I may have felt a “what?!” moment only because my pregnancy was different than my first and I could’ve sworn I was having a boy, but never did I feel sad or upset or annoyed in the least.
Now with baby #3, we tried everything we could to have a boy. And as much as people swear by different tricks, whatever you get is what G-d gives you. At our gender ultrasound, when we were asked what gender our kids were now, we said two girls. Then technician looked a little more and said, “well, you’re going to have a third!” I remember the feeling like… well I’ll be damned LOL! And poor husband was a little confused. He even said it can still be a boy. You never know until it’s born!
But after that visit, I remember leaving and thinking “OMG, a third girl.” All I could think of was how flipping cute it will be walking around with girls. I not once had a thought like “ugh, I can’t believe this.” That thought never even crossed my mind. I’ll be 100% honest, I was really happy she was a girl. And no, I am not saying that for this blog post. I’m being honest.
Now, before having each and every one of my girls, I kept making myself believe I wanted a boy. Okay. Well… maybe I did. But thinking back, I did because it was the social pressure of everyone around me saying I need a boy. I need a son to carry our name. But you know, I’m quite happy with where I’m at. G-d has given me what I deserve. I got my princesses. Each one makes me crazy in their own way and I wouldn’t change it, EVER!
I know people who have just boys. Do they want a girl? I’m sure they do or did. But I know they’re just as happy with their boys. And I have some friends with just girls. They’re so happy too. Whatever we get, we get. And trust me, we shouldn’t get upset. Because we get what we are given. We should be thankful we can have kids. And gender shouldn’t be something we are forced into believing is “a must” when it comes to having a boy if you have all girls and vice versa.
How I feel about having all girls? Happy as hell! It’s so fun! I enjoy having girls. It’s like I was made to have girls LOL! And same goes for those with all boys. They’re happy as hell too. The only concern one should have when pregnant is the health of their baby. THATS IT!
At the end of the day, as each child is born regardless of gender, the parent loves their child with all their heart. If they had a thought of “I wish I was having a girl” or “I wish I was having a boy”, once that child is born, those thoughts and wishes vanish. It’s as if they never even existed.
Just remember, don’t let stupid comments or questions get to you. Because in all reality, you will get asked those questions or get bombarded with stupid comments. Best you can do is smile and respond with “I am very happy I have healthy children.” THANK YOU, NEXT! Lol!
Hope this post shed some light to those under the social pressure of “needing” to have a specific gender. You’re not alone. Just remember, you will be or are happy no matter boy or girl. I know I am very happy with my 3 girls and thankful I could have them!