I decided to write this post on Raising a Confident Daughter because I have a tween daughter who needs some confidence building help.

I’m not exactly sure why she lacks confidence. She thinks very low of herself and is definitely not confident. AND she lacks the self esteem she needs.

Maybe it’s because girls in school were mean, or maybe I didn’t do something right at home. But I am here now working as much as I can to help her build up her confidence and self-esteem again. Therefore, since this is a topic I deal with, why not help others with tips on how to raise a confident daughter.

{READ MORE on 7 Ways to Connect with a Tween HERE}

How to raise a confident daughter

Every time I hear her say “Whatever, my drawing isn’t even that good” I tell her NOT to say that. I say her drawing is amazing and she shouldn’t bring herself down.

She even mentioned this past summer at camp that she told her partner that she’s sorry she made them lose the race. I said “NO YOU DID NOT!!” I told her she should NEVER apologize for something like that and that she shouldn’t allow others to feel she’s the reason why they lose or why things happen the way they do. It was NOT her fault. Definitely a confidence issue.

So here we have it. A short simple list of how you as a parent can help raise a confident daughter. Because let’s be real: Girls need the most help when it comes to confidence and self esteem.

Tips on Raising a Confident Daughter

Model Body Acceptance

This is one of the things girls as they get older tend to have issues with.

Nowadays, body image has become a hot topic and many feel if they don’t look like models or famous people in the magazines, that they’re not good enough.

Let your daughter know she looks beautiful regardless. Keep praising her appearance and tell her all about body acceptance. Let her know everyone is beautiful in their own way. God didn’t create people to look the same. He created us to all have a different form of beauty and all forms are beautiful.

Remember, it’s also not about what’s on the outside though even so that is what everyone sees. It’s more what’s on the inside and when raising a confident daughter, this is a must.

How to raise a confident daughter

Don’t Raise her to be a Pleaser

No one is perfect. NO ONE.

Firstly, she doesn’t need to be a people pleaser. She should do things for herself, not for others. The only person she needs to be pleasing is herself. If what she does makes her happy or feel good, that’s all that matters. It’s about her, not others.

Make sure your daughter knows this and knows it well because as we all know it, those trying to please others are trying to be perfect which is impossible. And the more they try to be perfect, they get more frustrated as they don’t succeed in “being perfect.”

Let her know her imperfections are just as beautiful and she doesn’t need to be perfect in anyway. And especially the fact that EVERYONE HAS IMPERFECTIONS AND NO ONE IS PERFECT.

Praise her Imperfections

Sounds weird, right?

When it comes to raising confident daughters, praising her imperfections lets her know that regardless, whether she feels so or not, she’s perfect just the way she is.

Yes, I said perfect, but everyone is perfect in their own ways. Not that there is a set PERFECT. But remind her that her imperfections she has are just as beautiful as she is.

How to raise a confident daughter

Have her Join a Sports Team

THIS!

This is especially true for my daughter. She didn’t really join a sports team, but she does figure skating. This in itself makes her feel amazing. She feels so confident when she mentions to people she does it because let’s be honest, figure skating is not an easy sport and the fact she does it is HUGE.

Joining a sports team or doing a sport like figure skating builds confidence in girls because she can do something not all girls can do or are doing.

Help her Build her Independence

My daughter is definitely not fully independent. She still relies a lot on me! I blame myself for that honestly. I need to take a step down.

Teaching your daughter to be independent will help build her confidence. The more she can do things on her own, the more confident in herself she’ll be. Raising a confident daughter requires parents to let them be more independent and to figure things out for themselves at times.

Praise her Efforts Rather than her Performance

Don’t just praise your daughter when she succeeds or performs well.

Praise her all the time. Praise her for her efforts. It takes a lot to put in effort to do something. And if success isn’t all there, this can bring her down and you praising her efforts will bring her right back up. This is a major tip to raising confident daughters.

Don’t Allow Degrading Comments in the House

This is a hard one.

Whether it’s siblings, a parent… whoever it may be. Monitor comments.

I have my middle daughter telling my oldest she’s fat. But she’s not. My middle daughter is just really skinny. I tell her A MILLION TIMES not to say that to her sister because 1. It’s not true and 2. We just don’t say those things to anyone.

How to raise a confident daughter

Make Sure She Knows You LOVE Her

The final tip on raising confident daughters:

Make sure your daughter knows she is loved. Think about it. When you feel loved, how do you perform? Well, there you go. You have your answer.

Show your daughter how much you love her and on the DAILY. This will keep her confidence and self-esteem in place.


Having confidence and a good self-esteem is hard for anyone, especially for girls. Even for us adults. But we should work raising a confident daughter. This way they feel good about themselves and succeed without anything holding them back.

If you enjoyed this post, be sure to check out When Should You Let Your Daughter Wear Makeup HERE!

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Posted by:The Stylish Mommy

Mommy of 3 girls and I blog about all things Life with kids as well as hints of Fashion and Beauty. If you get to know me, I’m a fun and silly person to be around who loves having a good time. But yes, I have my flaws and suffer from anxiety and want to help others who suffer as well. And when I’m in need of therapy, I turn to shopping. Who doesn’t!?

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